Revising, then re-revising

For my current project I’m re-reading the opening lines again and again, and revising, then re-revising.

With each draft I go a little further, adding voices, taking out stanzas, finding words malleable, nothing set in stone.

It’s liberating, this way of revising, but also terrifying. Everything keeps changing. And the implication of such changes (in my mind, at least) is that whatever I wrote to begin with must have been wrong … or not good enough. 

I have to remind myself that each draft is in a state of becoming. 

I have to tell myself it may not be good enough yet, but it will become good enough if I keep revising it.

This doubt (about whether it’s good enough, about whether I’m good enough) only intensifies with each draft and becomes another obstacle that I have to overcome if I want to return to the page each day. 

What’s critical is that I learn to ignore this voice saying I’m not good enough. (Or why bother? Or you’ll never succeed.)

To succeed I need to keep working on the draft. 

I need to keep revising. 

I need to keep alive the curiosity that wants to know what happens next… and what might happen if I add this word or take away this phrase… and how the poem or story might change… and how the reader’s understanding of the story might deepen.

So I keep revising, waiting with hope for the puzzle pieces to fall into place. 

It feels like I’m working without a net.

And on some days I wonder why I do this.

Maybe it’s because I feel such pleasure discovering what might happen, creating something new, something never seen before. 

Maybe it’s because I enjoy carving a path where there never was a path before.

You know the feeling, too, I’m guessing. 

How following your own path leads to moments of discovery that are a source of joy. (Maybe I should call them moments of revelation.) 

Suddenly, the page opens in ways I never could have predicted, and a source of light illuminates the darkness.

This is what I love most about writing.

How the words flow from my pen each morning, how the ink appears on the page, how the lines form into stanzas, paragraphs, poems, stories.

How writing lets me feel as if I’m part of a larger story that I’m trying to tell (and trying to figure out at the same time).

And, most of all, how I can look back after a day or week or month at the pages that have accumulated and feel that I am where I belong, here, with paper and pen in hand, part of an ongoing mystery.

Every morning

Every morning I sit down 

at my desk not knowing 

what I'll write, 

not knowing if 

I'll find the words

to write anything at all.

I can spend hours filled 

with doubt that I have nothing 

to say, no words forming

in the back of my throat

waiting to emerge.

There's only silence 

and doubt, and a kind of

stubborn determination 

that I must write something

if the day--if my life--

is going to mean anything.

I listen for words,

for a sound,

for a whisper,

hoping I'll hear something 

that will prompt a word 

to emerge out of hiding.

It's like playing a game of

hide-and-seek. 

All I need

is one word--

one syllable,

one sigh--

and I can pull it 

like a loose thread

and, with luck,

find more words.

And once the words 

begin to appear,

the worries vanish.

There's only the pen

moving quickly 

over the blank page

trying to catch the words

like butterflies

before they disappear.

Jump-start your writing

As the year comes to an end, you might feel like the source of words that you draw on throughout the year is empty.

If you prefer finding your way to the holiday table and taking a break from writing, that’s fine. It’s good to rest and recharge, of course, and to think about what you might want to write in the year ahead.

It’s also good to take the end of the year to review what you’ve written over the past twelve months and to congratulate yourself for all the work that you’ve done, regardless of whether your words found their way into print.

If you want to keep writing but your mind is blank or you don’t know what to write, here are a few suggestions that might help you jump-start your writing. 

1. Explore Memories

Do you remember how it felt to spend time with your best friend in elementary school? Or the time you discovered a passion for something—reading or basketball or knitting or running—and you couldn’t wait to do it? Or when you were the last picked for the kickball team? You can write about these memories—the feel of a book in your hands as you sat reading as a child late into the night; the way it felt to finish your first ten mile run in high school; or how  you came to be friends with the girl sitting across the aisle from you in third grade. Your memories can serve as a rich source of material for you to explore further in the year ahead.

2. Express Gratitude

Sometimes we forget each breath that we inhale and exhale is a gift, each word a kind of miracle, each story filled with magic, and we fail to offer words of gratitude for all the blessings in our life. What if you stopped for a moment and made a list of all the things and people that you’re grateful for. How long would the list be? And who and what would you put on the list? Can you pick one thing, one person,  one blessing? Can you write about why you feel grateful for it? Can you write about how gratitude can change your perspective. And what it feels like to be grateful?

3. Place Yourself In the Moment

If you’re searching for words, for something to write, you might look up from your desk and take a look around you. Look! Really look at where you are now. Describe the room, or the forest, or the beach, or the interior of your office or the movie theater where you’re sitting at the moment or the boat or car. What do you see and hear and feel? Can you taste the breeze? Can you smell popcorn popping in the theater lobby? Each moment contains a wealth of details (for which we can be grateful). If you can stop and notice the details, you’ll find yourself with plenty to write about. The details themselves might not prove interesting, but once you begin writing, you never know what kind of story you’ll discover unfolding beneath your pen.

4. Face Your Fear

Everyone is afraid of something. What’s your biggest fear? What prevents you from doing what you want to do? Why are you afraid? Where does this fear come from? How can you face it so that eventually you can overcome it? One of my teachers once told me that the best writing comes only when we cross the yellow police tape stretched across our imagination and explore the region of our mind that we’ve been told is off-limits, forbidden, closed. Can you find the courage to cross the tape? Can you learn the truth of why you’re afraid? Most important, can you find a way to write about it?

5. Fall in Love 

Each of us experiences love in different ways. Some of us remember the love of a mother before she died of cancer. Others know the love of a brother or father or daughter or son. Maybe we know the love of a partner. Or perhaps our love expresses itself in kindness to animals—cats, dogs, horses, hamsters, whatever living thing you find yourself attracted to. Can you describe who or what you love? Can you explain why you feel so strongly about a person or an animal or an object or event? What is it that you love about it? Sometimes we just need to find out what we love… and what we think about what we love.

These are five possible ways to jump-start your writing at the end of the year (or any time of year, really). There are a gazillion other ways. (See the links below.) Just opening the newspaper each morning for some writers is all they need to get their pens moving across the page. 

What’s your favorite prompt? How do you deal with periods in your writing life when you don’t know what to write? Why don’t you drop us a line and let us know in the comments below so others can benefit from your experience and so we can all start the new year writing something wonderful.

As the year comes to an end, I’d like to thank everyone for following Wordswimmer’s posts over the past twelve months. I’m looking forward to 2020 and hope to hear from you about your successes finding words (sometimes where you least expect them) in the year ahead.

Happy New Year!

For more införmation on jump-starting your writing, visit: 

https://daveursillo.com/7-ways-to-start-writing/

https://medium.com/@penguinrandomus/4-jedi-mind-tricks-to-jump-start-your-writing-project-5a67f90ab303

https://writingcooperative.com/how-to-jumpstart-your-writing-dbb08e679732

https://www.seerinteractive.com/blog/one-easy-way-to-jumpstart-your-creativity-and-become-a-better-writer/

https://writingcooperative.com/3-techniques-to-jump-start-your-writing-habit-45099420eb0e